"Know this, my dear brothers: everyone should be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath, for the wrath of a man does not accomplish the righteousness of God.
Therefore, put away all filth and evil excess and humbly welcome the word that has been planted in you and is able to save your souls. Be doers of the word and not hearers only, deluding yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his own face in a mirror. He sees himself, then goes off and promptly forgets what he looked like. But the one who peers into the perfect law of freedom and perseveres, and is not a hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, such a one shall be blessed in what he does." James 1: 19-25
“Let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” The reading goes on to tell us “humbly welcome the word that has taken root in you.” The question for me is: how do I welcome this word of being slow to anger? At one point in my life I was much like a priest who said, “I’m a priest, I don’t get angry -I get even,” except I didn’t get even, getting even was too close to anger, when what I experienced was at most rightful indignation.
The expression “be slow to anger” sounds like an oxymoron. The experience of anger is not slow, but overcomes one rather quickly. So I have tried to avoid anger for a long time. I have discovered that I end up falling into the well known trap of unconscious, passive aggressive behavior.
What does one do? One seems to be in the dilemma of either being overcome by anger or overcome by passive aggression (albeit unconscious). Take your pick. It’s like the option of sugar or sugar substitutes: do you prefer the calories or the risk of cancer? Except that one can always go without sugar, whereas the anger or passive aggression seems to be a forced dilemma.
What is it about anger that I am afraid of? Such a question reveals something powerful: perhaps the problem is not so much anger, but the fear of anger. Why do I fear anger? Because I do not want to snap at people, and say something harmful.
Perhaps experiencing anger does not necessarily lead to snapping at people. I think this may be what the scripture may be getting at by admonishing us to be slow to anger. Be slow to anger may be paraphrased as experience anger, but do not be overcome by it. The question is, How? In my limited experiential knowledge, two things seem most important. First of all anger must be acknowledged to ourselves. Perhaps the reason why some people react so quickly when they are angry is because they haven’t first acknowledged that they are angry. Second, maintaining an awareness of God’s presence: “The word that has taken root in you has power to save you” says the text. We are to remember this word constantly, not be like the man who looks at himself at the mirror, goes off and promptly forgets what he looked like. Rather than snapping at someone, experiencing anger in remembrance of the Word, may help us say with Jesus, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do,” or perhaps, we may be angry at a social injustice, and in the spirit of compassion be led to do something about it. These two steps of acknowledging our anger to ourselves, and doing so in the context of our relationship with God are difficult, no doubt. So let us practice often! And may St. Augustine, and Our Mother of Good counsel pray for us!
Carlos J. Medina, OSA
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